The far-leftist social justice ideology dictates that people's self-proclaimed preferred pronouns should be respected and used, even when this announced preferred pronoun seems to be blatantly against the biological sex of the person, even if the pronoun doesn't linguistically fit at all (such as using a plural pronoun to refer to a single person), and even if this pronoun is a completely made-up nonsense word. They argue that this is the polite thing to do, the respectful thing to do.
The problem is what happens if you don't use these pronouns when referring to someone. They want consequences bestowed upon you. They will attack you, harass you, defame you, smear you and, in some countries, even the police may make a visit to intimidate and harass you.
That's where these "preferred pronouns" stop being a form of politeness and become compelled speech.
The fundamental right to free speech does not only mean that you are free to express your opinions without punishment, and to be able to listen to other people's opinions without punishment and without hindrance or impediment. It also means that you are not forced to say something, such as using particular words or expressions, lest you be punished. You are not only free to say what you want to say, but you are also free to not say something you don't want to say, without punishment. Compelled speech goes as much against this principle as restricted speech.
Politeness does not imply compulsion. For example, if a complete stranger says "hello" to you, it may be polite to respond in kind, but not saying anything, while it might be seen as a bit rude, does not result in some kind of punishment being bestowed upon you.
It's polite to say "thanks" to the cashier at the grocery store, but not saying so should not result in some kind of punishment. You are free to not say anything if you don't want to.
Moreover, you should be free to be impolite if you so wish. Sure, the people you are impolite to may become antipathic towards you and if it continues may even start avoiding you, but once again, this shouldn't lead to some kind of punishment. In a free society nobody can force you to be polite to others if you don't want to.
Thus, if you repeatedly "misgender" someone, that someone is free to dislike you and start avoiding you. However, once you start getting some kind of punishment for it, be it social or even legal, that's where it becomes compelled speech and breaches the boundaries of a free constitutional society that guarantees freedom of speech.
Respect is earned, not deserved. Nobody deserves a kind of "respect" that involves compelled speech. Someone may earn that respect via their personality, opinions, charisma and actions, but nobody should have the right to compel others to say particular words, lest they face punishment.
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